In the wee hours of the morning on May 15, 1990, an event took place that forever changed our family. I gave birth to a baby. Not just any baby. A boy baby. This boy baby would join his two sisters to complete our sweet little family. We couldn’t have been happier. We knew we were having a boy and, for the first time, the color scheme changed to from pink to blue. No more frills and lace. No more dolls. No more My Little Pony. This time it’s a boy. This time it’s different for me. I had two sisters and two daughters up to this point. I didn’t come to the table with boy experience. I just knew I loved him. He was my son. I’m the mother of a son now. His name is Tyler Daniel Garvin.
Tyler’s sisters, Marcia and Amy, couldn’t wait to get their hands on their little brother. They didn’t come to the table with boy experience either. But they sure were excited about their new little brother. They were almost 10 and 12 when Tyler was born. That was just enough of an age gap for them to truly enjoy their brother without considering him as a bratty little brother. The whole family enjoyed him. The girls were involved in several activities and I didn’t want a disruption of their routines to cause any resentment toward their baby brother. So, I dragged this little guy from pillar to post. Bless his heart. He was so adaptable and easy.
As he grew, he did all the things that you would expect from little boys. He loved riding toys, dogs and Power Rangers. As a toddler, he would push his plastic lawn mower, which he called his cut grass, behind his daddy as he cut the grass.
He loved baseball and wanted to play as soon as he was old enough. Tee ball was the first year of baseball for him. He loved every minute of it. Sam coached his team just as he had done for our daughters playing softball. He tried several other sports: soccer, basketball and track and field. Baseball was his love and that love never left him.
I made all my children take music. Tyler’s first involvement with music was 6th grade orchestra where he played the violin. While he didn’t love the practicing part of music, he always wanted to stay involved. And he did. He played violin until the 10th grade when he switched to string bass.
He graduated from high school with honors and now attends Florida Southern College in Lakeland, Florida majoring in Music Management and is the principal chair bassist for all their ensembles in addition to being the President of his professional music fraternity. Several of his professors have told us how much they enjoy having him around. He is happy, well-adjusted and on track to graduate in four years.
Such a handsome young man. It’s a shame that all the barber shops in his college town have shut down.
Entertaining his niece and nephew.
Having that sweet little baby boy did change our lives forever. He was a pleasure and we all enjoyed him growing up and seeing the world through his eyes. What we didn’t come to learn until he was 2 years old, was that Tyler was only seeing the world through one eye. He had no useful vision in his left eye. Through a routine pediatric exam, his pediatrician noticed an irregular shaped dark blotch in his eye. We were able to secure an appointment with a pediatric ophthalmologists the next day. This appointment was over 18 years ago and I still remember my heart jumping up in my throat and the sting I felt when the doctor said, “Your son has a cataract and he is essentially blind in that eye”. How could this be? We never had any indication there was a visual deficit. He was born with a cataract and was diagnosed withPersistent Hyperplastic Primary Vitreous (PHPV). The space at the back of the eye, behind the lens, is normally filled with a clear jelly. This jelly is called the vitreous. Children with PHPV are born with a hazy, scarred vitreous. In Tyler’s case, his lens was covered by a cataract in addition to the scarring of the vitreous. He still has no useful central vision in his affected eye.
It was important for you to know the end of the story before knowing the story itself. This young man who was an honor student, baseball player and talented musician had to fight many battles to enjoy his station in life today. Along with enduring 5 eye surgeries, he had to learn to compensate for a Specific Learning Disability that was a result of his visual disruptions which made writing and reading comprehension quite challenging. Multiples eye surgeries altered the color of one pupil so his eyes were different colors. Kids noticed that…a lot. His lack of depth perception, caused by the vast difference in visual acuity in each eye, made it sometimes difficult for him to judge the speed and distance of baseballs. The kids without vision difficulties didn’t always understand that. Some of the coaches didn’t either. A lot of things in Tyler’s life caused him a great amount of frustration and angst. My heart ached for him.
Tyler, you had to walk a long journey to find your place. You came up against a part of life that wasn’t always kind. Looking at you now as you go about your busy and fulfilling life, it seems that your visual impairment will never stand in the way of a good life. You’ve got it all figured out. I can clearly see that.
Y’all come see us.
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Tyler’s Mixed Berry Cobbler
Cobbler is one of Tyler’s favorite things to eat. I made a special one, just for him, and delivered it to him at school on a night that we were on campus to see one of his music performances.
I made a shortcake topping. Put flour, sugar and orange zest in a bowl and mix.
Add melted butter and milk. Mix well.
I used 6 inch ramekins. Put about a tablespoon of melted butter in each dish.
Place three cups of mixed berries, one cup of water, 1/2 cup sugar and the juice of one lemon in pot. Bring to a boil.
After berry mixture comes to a quick boil, ladle into dishes. This amount was enough for three 6-inch ramekins. I scooped out the shortcake mixture and place two shortcakes on each ramekin. Sprinkle with cinnamon. Bake at 425 degrees until berry mixture is bubbly and shortcake is brown. It will take 20 to 25 minutes.
Final product! I wanted the berry mixture to be a little bit soupier than I normally make my cobblers so you could smash the shortcake down into the juice.
For shortcakes:
2 1/3 cups Original Bisquick mix
zest from one orange
1/2 cup buttermilk
3 1/2 tablespoons sugar
3 tbsp. melted butter
cinnamon
Mix baking mix, sugar and orange zest. Add buttermilk, melted butter and mix until soft dough forms.
For filling:
3 cups mixed berries
1 cup water
1/2 cup sugar
juice of one lemon
3 tbsp. melted butter
Place berries, water and sugar in pot. Bring to a quick boil. Add one tbsp. melted butter to each 6 inch ramekin. After berry mixture boils, divide evenly between the three ramekins. Top each with two scoops of shortcake batter. Sprinkle with cinnamon. Bake at 425 until filling is bubbly and shortcake is browned, about 20 to 25 minutes.
Jennifer says
Jackie, thank you so much for sharing this post about Tyler. I live in FL too and my two year old son has phpv & microphthalmia in his left eye. To see your son gives me hope that my son has the potential to do anything he wants in life. I also want to mention that Tyler was certainly blessed with good looks too! Thanks again for reaching out & sharing your perspective as a mom.
Jackie Garvin says
Jennifer,
Thank you so very much for your kind remarks. Bless your heart! I wish you and your family the very best that life has to offer.
Sam Garvin says
Tyler, I echo every word that you Mom has written. I’m proud to be your Dad. Keep up the hard work. Dad
LeahGG says
Thank you. My son, Ephraim (2), has PHPV too, and it’s good to hear about kids with PHPV who are so successful!
Jackie Garvin says
Leah,
I’m so glad to hear that you found Tyler’s story inspirational. I wish you and your family the best. Please come back to visit us.
vickie says
Thanks so much for sharing.One of the reasons this person made so much progress in life is because of the love and guidance of two caring parents that wanted their child to be the best he could be and gave him that chance. I know you two are so proud of him.
Jackie Garvin says
Vickie,
Your thoughtful comments brought tears to my eyes. Bless your sweet little heart. Please come back to visit us again.
Denise says
Dear Garvin Family,
Best Wishes to all of you for a bright and happy future! As a Mom to a 13 yr old boy (Brian) with PHPV, it gives me confidence to read your story. Congratulations on raising a successful young man who does not let PHPV keep him from achieving his goals. (any advice on doing this would be appreciated!)
Thank you!
Denise
Jackie Garvin says
Denise,
Thank you so much for your comments. I think we may have exchanged some emails through the Yahoo PHPV groups. Best wishes to you and your family. Brian will do just fine with the wonderful support that I know his family provides. I hope you come back to visit us here.
PattyM says
What a wonderful story – – you are obviously very proud of your son, but you should be proud of yourself also for helping him grow into the talented, wonderful young man that he seems to be!
I love the cobbler recipe – I made my first one a few months ago, and it was so delicious, I couldn’t stop eating it! (I’ve made it two more times since)!
Jackie Garvin says
Patty,
Bless your heart for being so gracious with your comments. Our family is truly blessed and I think I’m the most blessed one of the whole bunch! We have a wonderful life. I hope you will come back to visit us here and be a part of it , too!
Cobblers are just wonderful. My whole family is nuts over them. I made this recipe a tad different than I normally do. Same principal, just a little change up with the ingredients. Don’t ever stop making those cobblers!
Shannon says
Stopping by from Southern Mommas! What a great site!
It’s funny that you should post an entry with this title, it is one of my Dad’s favorite songs and I was just talking about it with a friend the other day!
That picture of your son playing to the babies is simply precious!
Looking forward to reading more. Recipe looks yummy!
Jackie Garvin says
Shannon,
I’m so glad you stopped by. Come on in! I’m so happy to be part of Southern Mommas. See you around!
Shannon says
Oh, and swing by and say hi if you can.
Webbisodes
http://ourgatorzone.blogspot.com
Nayeli Arias says
Your post was very touching for me,I also have to girls (17 and 10) and my boy was also very expected. Your story give me more confidence that my son Xavi (2)will have the same chances that any other boy could have, my husband want to put him in every sport, and I have to admitted, it is very scary for me, because he also is blind from his PHPV right eye, and I’m terrified when I think in what would happen if he get hurt of his left eye. However, when I read posts about successful kids like yours, those fears start vanishing from my heart.
Thank you so much to share, Your family is an inspiration for parents like me.
Jackie Garvin says
Nayeli,
Thank you for writing to me. I wish the very best that life has to offer you and your family. I know you are in a place right now with your son being so young that it’s hard for you to imagine your son’s future. Just love him and be positive. Make sure that his “good” eye is protected but then let him lead a normal life. These kids are amazingly adaptable. I worried about my son’s safety, too. But, then again, I had concerns about the safety of my daughters and they had no visual deficits. Take care of yourself and your family. Please stay in touch.
Danny Taylor says
Thanks for this enlightening informational blog on Tyler…I can relate to he’s problems as described as I had a retinal detachment in my left eye as did uncle Payton and two cataracts and suffer from the depth perception that plagues Tyler and most folks don’t understand as they have no idea what it’s about but that’s understandable. My hats off to Tyler and his striving to excel.
Aunt Virgina could make a mean black berry cobbler…such memories of the kitchen and good times. keep them coming!
Jackie Garvin says
Thanks, Danny! I never knew you had a detached retina. You certainly can relate to Tyler’s situation. And, bless Grandaddy’s heart. He never once complained about his visual deficit. He rarely even mentioned it. He just accepted it and went on about his business.
I’ve got a whole write up about Granny and her blackberry cobblers. Blackberries are the one food that I most closely tie to my childhood. Happy memories!
kitchenarian says
Such an inspirational story about your son; thanks for sharing. I, too, love cobbler and this recipe looks great. Thanks.
Jackie Garvin says
So glad you stopped by, Kitchenarian. I hope you visit us again. You’re always welcome.
Brandie says
I am so happy you came over and commented on my facebook page so I could find out about your blog. What a beautiful post about a mother’s love for her son! I was just tearing up so much as I read this! It is so hard sometimes to watch your baby become a man but it is so rewarding to see the man he has become! I LOVE your blog. Your recipes are great!
Jackie Garvin says
Brandie,
I’m so glad you found your way here, Miss Thecountrycook! I am enjoying all your posts so much. Thank you for your kind sweet words about this post. I am getting me some jello and fruit and making some Oragne Delight. Can’t wait!! Thanks so much for that post. Welcome to my home, Brandie. We are so glad you are here.
adeyera says
I enjoyed reading this interesting article, I am not a cook but I will ask my wife to visit your blog so that she can learn from you. Keep up the good work.
Jackie Garvin says
Thanks for stopping by!
Karen Schenck says
I loved your story! I had three daughters before having my son and he is a light in my life. They are so different than girls. Thanks for sharing your son’s story.
Jackie Garvin says
Karen,
Thanks for stopping by! Please come back and visit again. You’re always welcome.
Judy says
Nice blog, the cobbler looks wonderful! Made me want a scoop of vanilla ice cream too. 😀
Thanks for stopping by Savoring Today and leaving your link, it was fun visiting your site.
Jackie Garvin says
Judy,
Thanks for stopping by. I hope you will visit again.
virginia ann says
It is interesting your son was born with a cataract, my nephew was born with one 17 years ago. I had never heard of it before then & this is the first time I’ve heard of it since, it must be very rare. I just found this site today I am enjoying it.
Jackie Garvin says
Virginia Ann,
I can’t tell you the exact numbers for the incidence of congenital cataracts, but it is pretty rare. I hope your nephew is doing well.